I am reminded of that EVER day. Cancer sucks! There really aren't words to describe it: it is scary, terrifying, I am nervous, anxious and just hate it all. Right when I think I am kind of getting use to our new normal, I realize I am not.
Just over a week ago John started coughing a lot. He also had a low grade fever off and on. He was so bummed because he was going to go to church Sunday. But could not go with this "cold". We were kind of putting off calling the Dr., pretty sure they would admit him to the hospital and Christmas was right around the corner. He had an appointment the day after Christmas. Turns out he has pneumonia - AGAIN!!! But they did surprise us by saying he could do oral antibiotics at home :) He coughs a lot and is slowly getting better. He finally does not have a fever after 6 days of having one.
John's parents are in town for Christmas. We had them staying with us for 6 days. It was fun, but hard for John. He wanted to be able to do things with them and can't. It has been snowing a lot and we all went out to play in the snow Christmas Eve and John couldn't :( simple things that most people do not think of. He did not even go to Christmas dinner at his brothers house on Christmas day. He did not go with us to temple square to look at lights. I hate it!!! It is so hard and so not fair. Some times I feel like people are very insensitive to what is going on. But I realized that just because our family of 7 has to live with John having cancer does not mean every one else does. I just think about life so differently now. It is so hard to not be able to do "normal" things.
Christmas was really good. It snowed most of Christmas Eve. Instead of our usual movie out tradition, we had a movie in. Grandma and Papa gave the kids "Brave" and we all sat and watched that. I picked up chinese take out) which is our Christmas eve tradition and we had a good evening. Kids went to bed good and John went to bed early. John's brother Dave and his family stayed the night here and that was super fun. I was grateful for the help from John's parents and Brook and Dave and Abigail. Everything was wrapped, but still took us a while to set everything out. We were super super blessed by others. Several people gave us $$$ and several others dropped off presents!! Kids had more this Christmas than they ever have gotten. It was fun watching them open so many presents. But, John was very low on energy and it was a crazy morning.
John and I were married on Dec. 27, 1996. So we were celebrating our 16th anniversary yesterday. Gratefully a good friend offered to bring us dinner and take our kids overnight. Another thing that sucks, we can't go anywhere!!! So we were celebrating in. It was nice, just different. I can't wait till we can just go our to dinner and a movie :) We played "LIFE" (John's pick of a game), and had dinner and watched "Modern Family". I got to sleep in this morning, but John had to be at the hospital at 8 am. Life is changing so so much. I don't think I will ever get use to it.
John and I playing LIFE on our Anniversary.
John and I last year on our Anniversary. I surprised him and took him to NYC for 3 1/2 days. It was a great trip, and I am grateful for the memories.
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